Wednesday, September 16, 2009

silence

The silence is the time when I am most troubled
Something about there being no sounds
Nothing to focus your mind on when it begins to drown
And thoughts are the only thing that is left to hold.
The placidity of silence is when the evil that lurks becomes apparent
And all the demons that go bump in the night play,
Too many people to see their agenda in the light day
Guards placed to high to keep prying eyes ever distant.
Everyone knows its most quiet before the storm
And when the silence comes, I remember what was
How I learned to see true thoughts despite what one says or does
When the silence lets people feel free of the need to conform.
The animals take refuge knowing the wicked that this way creeps
Even the trees hold still their branches, under its spell
Calm so thick even your heartbeat quells
When the silence is thick enough to wake you from your sleep
And the façade of strength you can no longer keep.
The silence is the time when I am most troubled.
When my memories come to life
And the ache seems to double
The silence is the time when I am most troubled.


©2009 jasmîne gabrielle

Friday, September 4, 2009

guilty until proven innocent

Tell me where did you go when you left the club last night
What streets did you travel? Where did you sleep?
Were you telling the truth when you said it was just your boys with you?
All these questions, never to be asked or answered
I don’t have to, because I can just follow you if I don’t think you’re true
Guilty until proven innocent- just like every other cheating bastard

Tell me who did you call in the wee hours of the morning
What is she to you? Does she know you intimately?
Are you telling the truth when you say that’s your cousin
All these questions, never to be asked or answered
I don’t have to; I have your online bill login
Guilty until proven innocent- and I have your voicemail password

Tell me why doe your clothes smell of Paris Hilton perfume?
Is that what she smells like? Does she work it better than me?
Is it true that my cousin saw you bring her flowers at her job yesterday?
All these question, never asked or answered
I don’t have to; I have spies in every company –all I have to say
Guilty until proven innocent, they can get any information if I just say the word

Tell me what your plans are for the future- for you and me
Do you love me? Is this going somewhere?
Is it true that you are faithful and will be there forever and always?
All these questions never asked or answered
I don’t have to; I have bleach for your clothes when I can’t keep my jealousy at bay
Guilty until proven innocent, I’ll just stab you and plead insanity- yes, that’s my word.

Tell me are you going to take me home tonight and never call
Was it love at first sight? Am I just your jump off?
Is it true that men won’t buy the cow if they can get the milk for free?
All these questions, never to be asked or answered
I don’t have to, I’ll just call your girl when I find out I’m part of a party of three
Guilty until proven innocent, I operate in spite when perturbed.

Tell me will you act right after I bust the windows out your car?
Never hit back when I slap you? Jimmy the locks when I change them?
Is it true you’ll still love me after I curse your mama out and your girl cousins jump me?
All these questions, never to be asked or answered
I don’t have to, I’ll slice your leather seats, then wait and see
Guilty until proven innocent, I have the Dr. Jekyll/ms Hyde game mastered.

Tell me, will you still love me when I tell you to walk away
Understand I mean hold me? Promise to never let me go
Is it true you can understand me enough to love me until I let go of my issues
All these questions, never asked or answered
I don’t have to, I’m too scared of the answer, scared I will miss you
Guilty until proven innocent, so afraid to let go- not realizing I’m making you leave faster.


The “I” in this piece is figurative. Please don’t ask me tomorrow who I stabbed- I never have been violent with anyone lol. I can tell you that everything in this piece has happened and involved a friend, a friend’s cousin, a relative’s baby mama- someone I know. Why did I write this? Well, I was asked recently “What happened that makes you so scared to date me?” and I had to really think about it… the only answer I can come to is that I’m not over things that have happened in past relationships & I am terrified that the next time I wont take the high road, I wont act like a lady. I have watched women hold in their pain for so long and then let it out in the craziest ways that I want to make sure I’m securely in the ‘over it’ column before I attempt anything new.
In short, this is my warning, if you will, to the men I know… the line between love and hate IS thinner than you realize. And while that doesn’t give women license to go buck- you do need to understand when a woman tells you she needs time – there is a reason; and when she tells you she’s had enough- there is a storm brewing. Like I said- everything in here is true and that woman you thought was so sweet knows 100 times more than you give her credit for even if she has never asked you for the information.


© jasmîne gabrielle

i saw God today

I saw God today
He showed me I wasn’t without flaw
For I was too prideful to look in the mirror and be honest with what I saw
I saw God today
He made me know what it is to be of the earth
For I was too insolent to see I could return to just a notion as I was before my birth
I saw God today
He taught me what it is to be a mortal being
For I was unable to comprehend that both my joys and pains would be fleeting
I saw God today
He fixed what I was unable to mend
For I was to inexperienced to make the world shift and bend
I saw God today
He took my hand and made it his own
For I was too weak to hold myself up alone
I saw God today
He healed all that ailed my human form
For I was too desolate to see the light after the storm
I saw God today
He gave me hope when I thought it was lost
For I was too broken too offer my heart to cover my costs
I saw God today
He brought me though my deepest sorrow
For I was too low to believe in what He had planned for me tomorrow
I saw God today
He nestled me in his arms until I feared no longer
For all that I ever needed, He was equipped to offer.
I saw God today.


© 2009 jasmine gabrielle

i love who i love

There is nothing in my power I would deny you
And that which is just past my grasp, I will aspire to
I don’t need a list- just a passing mention, a subtle clue
It’s in my nature to help, to assist to make right
It makes me happy to that shoulder to lean on when you can no longer fight.
To remind you that the brightest days only come after the darkest nights
I do what I do because I love who I love

I have run myself to the ends of my earth for your needs time after time
Giving you comfort, even when it meant sacrificing mine
And if given the choice to do again, time I would not rewind
It fills me with delight to see the chain reaction
How my choice may fill others with action
That my love will inspire others to continue passing
I do what I do because I love who I love

My love for you has shown my that true generosity is never left unseen
In fact, for many it becomes expected- part of their routine
And that’s when I question the purity in motive and what your love for me really means
I share my blessings because I know you would do the same
But when I looked to you, the support never came
Confused, I wondered are you unable, unwilling or is my trust in you insane?
I do what I do because I love who I love

Am I asking too much to be thought about in kind
For the thoughts of aid to be not only mine
For a mutual want of the others success to be a tie that binds
Or should I just accept that not everyone is capable of extending a hand
That some connections are meant to blow away like grains of sand
But I refuse to give up, this is what makes me stronger, solidifies where is stand
I do what I do because I love who I love


© 2009 jasmine gabrielle

teacher friend mother

How do you define a teacher?
A lover of life with a need to show
To teach many things they never knew they wanted to know
One who gains expansion of self by helping others grow
Someone who smiles always when you see her
Causing the far recesses of the most closed mind to stir.

How do you define a friend?
A keeper of secrets with no expectations
To take your pain away they can see no limitations
Hold you tighter in life’s trials, and cheer hardest during your celebrations
Someone who is always there with a loving touch to lend
Whose presence is so unshakable you can’t imagine life without them.

How do define a mother?
A champion for all that you could ever do, be or conceive
If given the opportunity, your side she would never leave
But who loved you enough to forever trust and believe
That you would grow into an individual like no other
Allowing you to be who you are, while instilling the best that is in her.

How do you define a love all encompassing?
A woman able to be all these things to the people she sees
Yet still be the center of the universe for a select three
Able to balance all the world has ever asked her to do, act or be
For all of our days the holder of that was ever missing
In memories, in life, in lessons, all the best things
Quite simply, a blessing.







© 2009 jasmîne gabrielle

been away a while....

hey folks... yeah, short attention spans and all that.. you will start to see i have my phases of writing a lot and writing a little... here are my most recent and i'm working on new things now.
~j